I need to act more on my inspiration. It’s a failing to keep holding back and let the flame reach the end of the match before I reach out to light the candle. For the last two days, I’ve been thinking of a story concept for a movie script. The idea is strongly built around the lifelong relationship between a Father and a Son. Today I decided to step a little closer to the candle and write some notes for this movie. I know fear will hold me back and pride could trip me up but I want to get a little more daring and start this journey. I’m not too old and definitely not too young so the day seems to be about right.
One of the triggers for this movie script seemed to be the idea that under an unshaven chin and a sun-hardened frown our Dads are scared. As a Dad we’re often scared of how to lead, to act, to simply be in front of our boys. We walk in the worn steps of our own fathers and sometimes we feel we couldn’t measure up to the giant of a man who strode before us and for some, there are times we wonder if we can avoid being the man we saw beat a wife or kill a dream. It’s a deep-seated burden to be a father and yet the greatest joy is in the close hug, the hair tussle or wrestle with a son or better the unthinking conversations that just happen on a warm misplaced Sunday afternoon. When a son looks up to his father for reassurance and you can see in his eyes a visible change in demeanour as the spirit of ‘not sure’ is replaced by the strength of ‘Dad’s good with me’ you know it’s been a good day in Fatherhood.
My pleasure as a Father is equally inspired by my two boys and two girls. They push me forward to the next step where I can see the view is clearer than before. From their eyes I draw love to strengthen my own arms so I can lift them up beside me, allowing us to sit and engage the view of life together. I love with an absolute passion the life conversations I have with my children.
For my boys, I can’t help but know that my example, words and actions are a benchmark they will use. Sometimes we learn from others what to do and a week later the lesson is what not to do. My role as Dad is to be willing to tell them which was which so they know right from wrong, good from evil, love from selfishness and more importantly that they know themselves.
The Bible has a great verse in Proverbs 22 that says “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Last week we joked as a family that the verse might have said “Train up a child in the way he should dress and when is old…” well you get it, but thankfully while fashions change wisdom holds its sway.
When you go to see my movie in years to come I hope we can get Harry Chapin’s song “Cats in the Cradle” as a theme. Enjoy this live performance and step a little close to the candle before your fingers get burnt.